Here’s the thing, one toxic person can ruin your life. I’ve had it happen more than I would like to admit. I’m the person who gets stuck trying to save someone. I think I can fix them. I think I can help them. You cannot fix them. You cannot fix someone who doesn’t want to change. You cannot fix someone who doesn’t think anything is wrong. You cannot help someone who is happy being miserable. Every single time it ends up worse for me, they don’t change, and they just change me instead.
If there is someone in your life who is bad for you then you need to get them out. I know this isn’t easy. Sometimes it can seem impossible. But I promise you, that you can find someone who will support you, encourage you, and love you. You deserve someone who will lift you up, not tear you down. Misery loves company, so miserable people will just turn you into a miserable person to make themselves feel better. But really it just feels like you are being eaten inside. You keep telling yourself that you are doing them a favor, that you are helping, but you aren’t. You are only hurting yourself more. You deserve better than that.
The biggest problem I have with finding friends, is that we live in a negative world. We live in a world where it is burn or get burned. I am always surrounded by gossip and rumors that are portraying someone in a negative light. We would be so much happier if everyone could love everyone. Think about it this way, would you want me going around telling people that you are negative, rude, and no one likes you? No. You wouldn’t. So why go around and say that about me or anyone else?
If every single day all you hear is bad things, that is how you start to see the world. You start to see everyone as mean, everyone as rude, and everyone as a horrible human. I got to a point where I honestly did not see the good in anyone or anything. I found something to hate about everyone. I always had a bad impression of everyone I met. I don’t want to see the world like that. I want to be able to find the good. But that also means learning to detach from the negative people in your life.
I want to have people who bring joy, happiness, love and laughter to my life. We all need people who will add to our life, not take from it. No one is perfect, no one is happy all of the time. I know I’m not. But there is a line between being upset about something, and being toxic. If you have someone who is making your life worse, then you need to get rid of them in your life. You deserve better relationships.